Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
