i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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