Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Bang-toberfest begins!!
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize