How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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