I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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