Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
