Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
