No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Randomize
