I'm jealous of your bromance
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
