Nicole vs. Life
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.