Three words: puerto rican gang bang
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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