No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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