all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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