Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
