Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
