There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
not ubering you a puppy
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
