So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
