Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
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even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
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Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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