I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
