I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
there is puke in my bra ... again
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
