wake up i wanna do it froggy style
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
