do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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