Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
