the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
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This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
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We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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