Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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