No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
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