Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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