You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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