i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
