either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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