I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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