I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
