So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
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