You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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