I want to stick my p in your. b.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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