New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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