He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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