I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize