can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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