I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
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