I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
