I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize