the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
