imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
