She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
