how hairy? two words: wookie tits
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Randomize
