I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
