it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
