are you still at the devil's house?
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
