No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
